so lets see how messed up i really am..

This is the first entry so far so lets start off with a congrats to myself to actually getting this far. I don't know exactly where this is going to take off but let me introduce myself. My name is not eunice however, it is one of my many 'aka's. I'm 16 years old living in New York, and before anyone asks, no its not nyc; not even close.

I work at a nursing home at the moment and although its not the glam-est job ever, its worth the weekly paycheck. I just moved from a hell-hole of a town into a fancier-richier town and I don't know one person here although, I can not wait for school to start!

I'm an athiest and I probably will get comments about it however, I think I will risk it, as I want the readers to know the real me. I have a messed up family, just like everyone these days. My parents have been divorced since I was two years old and I hold alot of negative feelings towards my father, who recently is in jail. He probably will be bitched about ALOT in the future entries. He is an alcoholic who doesn't give a shit about me, and in return, I don't give a shit about him either. Although, if you talked to my younger brother, you'd hear how great the loser is.

I usually feel misplaced when I'm with my family and being a close italian family, we get together almost every weekend. I idolize my cousin and greatly miss her, as she no longer comes around anymore and has gotten herself into a tad of trouble. She is probably the most gorgeous person I know however, and I strive to be like her.

I have alot of emotional problems. I have a super low self-esteem about myself and I feel fat all the time. I feel ugly and always try to better myself, although my standards are way to high and are un-reachable. I used to cut alot but stopped after confessing I had been in an abusive relationship with a guy I loved. I was depressed for along time and went to counceling to over come it. For the first time in god knows how long, I actually eat, smile, and laugh.

Im not goint to lie, Im pretty messed up however, with a new start and a new beginning in a new town, I hope to overcome everything and become the person I always wanted to be. I won't forget about the past, but the future holds such an endless of new adventures that I need to fulfill.

But before you think I'm too crazy, I will tell you I'm a typical teenage girl. I shop like a maniac, I dye my hair and do my make alot, I straighten my hair all the time, and im obsessed with Kim Kardashian's website. I love boys and I love to party. My favorite color is pink and I never leave the house without my ipod. I love my friends and I text alot. I love car rides and I'm an animal rights activist. I love PETA and dogs are my favorite animal, by far. I complain alot and I love to write stories, however I will never let you read them.

And with that note, I welcome you to my blog.

xoxo

Eunice